I'M A BLESSED CHILD

when i tot tat i'm left alone at the corner, God proves that HE cares. i am blessed with so many things just today and the past fews :D sometimes, i think being born on the feb 29th is just such a marvelous thing :)

went out with the new expanded family members of our AMs gang -elwin and beatrice. had dinner at centerpoint after both of them courageously drove all the way up to my place for the first time from cheras. JUST FOR ME! can u feel the love?!! (i hear a loud OHH YEA! ) we were so embarassing loud (common stuff for me ;P ) that we shoo-ed the customers away and got ourselves som angry stares from people around. oopsie. haha. but it was good. we even went to the small playground to take photos. it was great. i enjoyed their company!! HEAPS! photos with beatrice.so.. hopefully will upload soon.

and tonight, i had one of the greatest nights in my hols and the best bday celebration in the past 4 years :)

thanks to these wonderful gorgeous fantabulous lovely adorable ... people.



and they got me these cute pretty lil things as my bday cake.



*melts*

we had a home-cook meal by the best chef ever- my mum.



and headed to yeen's house where i



rode an electric scooter! how cool is that! hahahahaa :P




it was truly a great night!!! seriously! i'm so loved now :)

thank You!

BACK FROM BANGKOK

i'm down with a flu. sick and currently home alone >.<

during this trip, i've learnt couple of things!

1. never go to thailand during chinese new year or any other festive seasons! it's PACKED with tourists.

2.try not to get sick when u're flying! it's so SOOO hard to balance the air pressure \

3. God has everything in place and in plan. perhaps going back late to melb is to spend more time with family? i duno. but it's been great.














emo.

i miss you. miss your loving and strong pressence that floods my heart. i'm so empty. i need your touch. for some while, i thought i was forgotten. i thought i wasnt important. teach me to live up to your expectations. i'm so scared, so unprepared.

WHAT'S NEXT?

currently.. i'm stuck at my mum's office. super bored. my bumm has been on this wooden chair for more than 3 hours. my back is aching. bad posture. blah blah blah.

anywayz.. just a quick update :)

even though i've been around to couple of places, i still felt that being in malaysia is somewat unproductive. but still.. i'm trying to make it better. trying to get more things done. trying to learn more, trying to widen up my experiences. but still, there's some hinderances. LAZINESS and TRANSPORT!! BAHHH

still.. seriously. i have to thank teck keong, desmond, my jimuis and all those who have driven me for always being so willing to take me around. cant imagine myself taking public and travelling under the hot sun, like how i used to in high school. but anyhoo.. the bus routes had changed i think. the number n fares are different from last time. reckon i'll get so lost if i just assumed n jumped on one! haha. still.. kl just scares me. i'm so pampered here :) wat to do. princess mar :P

anyhoo.. during the past few weeks, i've been actually quite active. come to serious thoughts. still.. been gaining heaps of weights due to the irresistable temptation of the evil chinese new year cookies n titbits! GRRR!! now.. achieving my pre-requisite fitness test will be a hard task. anywayzz... chinese new year so far has been pretty good. i'm getting heaps of angpaus. HEHEHE. well .. more than the past five years. u've gotta understand tat this is technically my first time in five years spending more than 2 days of cny in malaysia. so .. hip hip hooray to tat :)
chinese new year, to me, is a great way of spending time with family. great bonding times. now that few of my couz are overseas, this is the season when they come back and my chance to be with them :) it's just great :D

i'll upload some photos later.

apart from cny, if i backtracked, i've spent more time with my primary school frens this hols too :) i'm so proud of them!! still keeping in touch wiht so many ppl. we even went up to genting :) seriously, the bond is still there! amazing~ thank God!

also, i've been to sg chongkak with raymond, teck keong and beatrice. SOOOO FUN! will let the photos do the talk later also :)

one thing i realised this hols that watching drama series is a total waste of time! BOO!!! so addictive n so antisocial. sigh. y did i fall into the trap!! GRR.

hmmm .. i'll just update more after i've uploaded the photos.

off to bangkok tmr~!! YAYYYYYYY :) cant wait!! good food, shopping, here i come!! :)
oh ya. happy valentines day peeps! i love u!!

FIRE

Lord, i want the fire of God. Father God, i want to completely surrender myself to you and fear not the gazes of men. Lord Jesus, there are times when I have reserved. God, if there are parts when i served my dreams rahter than you, God, i pray that You'll remove them. Father, scrape off the impurity and work in my heart. put me through the heat and i thank you that i know i wont be going through it alone. Lord, thank you for affirming my calling. Father, thank you for loving me. Give me the courage to do what you have called me to and the strength to break through the case tat i'm enclosed in. Help me Lord, to give and to love.

Many hearts are hungry tonight
Many trapped in darkness
Yearn for the light
So many who are far from home
And so many who are lost
O Lord Your wounded children need
The power of Your cross

As bread that is broken
Use our lives
As wine that is poured out
A willing sacrifice

Empower us Father
To share the love of Christ
As bread that is broken Lord
Use our lives

Help us to begin where we are
Help us love the people
Near to our hearts
Then give our faith a mission field
Wherever You may call
Lord love Your world
Through each of us
Until we've touched them all

As wine that is poured out
As bread that is broken Lord
Use our lives

SWEET HEARTS <3

recently, i had the urge of calling the people i love sweetheart. i just love love them so much tat seeing them sweetens up my heart. wonder who actually invented this word. such a good fit! :)



when you're with the people you love, well for me, even though it's just plain talking, day dreaming in the car, eating, blah. watever. it's just a warm fuzzy feeling that colours up my heart. it's full of adventures. it's just like



even greater, God is my ultimate sweetheart :)
He holds my future in His hands.
i'm once again an OFFICIAL UNI STUDENT!!! say hello to the future nurse/paramedic.

i'll stand by you.




will you?

IN SEARCH OF SOMETHING PRECIOUS

i'm searching for 2 things at the moment. my beloved camera with lots of pictures back dated to sabah that i hadnt upload >.< CRAPPPP. so so sad.

the other, hurts my heart even more. seeing people i know going further and further from the light where we're all supposed to be walking in. i realised that i had been very very selfish. very very self-centered. recently, i walked past people, with a cant be bothered, there's-lots-of-time-left, maybe-someone-else-could-do-it lousy attitude. it's all so wrong. i had been consumed in my own world. literally, i had been in a nutshell, enjoying the unbeneficial attention, so shallow and GRRR. i cant believe of wat i had been up to for the past week. wat mindset had i been putting up on. i would really wanna flush myself in the toiletbowl. but i'm so glad God did what He wants.

the devil has tried to distract me with things. but no longer i'm under those fantacies. HELL NO! i've been woken up. i sense the urgency to GO. God is real. He opens a way. He WILL.

INDIA, i'll be there someday. kids, see the light. Jesus loves you and He is real.

Lord, I need Your grace and mercy.
I need to pray like never before.
I need the power of your holy spirit
To open Heaven's door.

Spirit touch Your church, stir the hearts of men.
Revive my soul with your passion once again.
I want to care for others
Like Jesus cares for me.
Let your reign fall on me, Oh Lord.
Let your reign fall on me.

Lord we humbly come before You.
We don't deserve of You what we ask.
But we long to see Your glory.
Restore this dying land.


if i'm so anxious about my camera with the beautiful memories, what more should i be when it comes to people?

random

#1. i met my primary school crush the other day . well i think it's him but i was too shy to say hi. bet he had forgotten me ages ago. we've both moved on i'd say. but it just reminded me of the innocence back then.

#2. chipmunks singing chinese new year songs! oh so weird.

missing you!!

i miss melbourne.
i miss sabah.
i miss kajang.
i miss malacca.
i miss durian orchards.
i miss G-to-be.
i miss PD.
but above all, i miss the people that has gone through each n every place with me.

BIDDING THE YEAR OF 2007
WELCOME 2008


finally.. i'm having the time to just reflect and think about the year now that all whole body is aching and i can barely move.. but i guess it's good as well. to sit down and be still. to think about the year and what has it meant to me. how can i improve.

random note:it's like pouring like mad out there and it's actually quite scary to be at home alone.. yet. somehow there's a part of me enjoying it. knowing that Jesus is with me :D

erhem. concentrate.

i guess the year 2007 in all has been a year full of learning experiences and growing opportunities. filled with love, smiles, tears, challenges, revelations, fall-flat-on-bed moments and lots more.

it surely wasnt a all smooth sailing and problems free year. but i really thank God tat there were times of mourning and uncertainties cos it made me understand that its time to grow up and learn to handle things. it's time to be held responsible. to be held accountable and to be accountable to others.so..

in the year 2007.. i'd

been a uni student.
met a whole lot of new people.extended by social circle
been in a ministry. children ministry. by God's grace.
first time renting a house
bought my very own furniture
performed on stage
cleaned the toilet for the very first time
cooked on a weekly basis
job hunting and worked in 4 different places.
been to a funeral for the very first time
talked and be-friends with my neighbour
loving the neighbourhood
travelled to the west of melbourne fortnightly
been through tensional relationships with family and frens
been hurt and loved.
stayed awake on adrenalin
went to jakarta with lots of other experiences attached to it
witnessed God's miracles.
understand the importance of authority and obedience
babysit neighbour's kids and was so blessed by it.
welcomed into a suburb family, God's family.
failed my Ps twice.
gained weight - BOOOOOO -
gone through stressful academical period
placed in an island of uncertainties
experienced God's faithfulness and providence.
been blessed by so many leaders, drivers, cooks and organiser.
went to strawberry picking for the very first time
learnt how to dance
attended graduations
went on the best vacations and outings

actually there's so so much more. it's just as wat the bible say in

Ecclesiastes 3

A Time for Everything

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

even as i was reflecting. i couldnt stop thinking and memories just flashed back into my mind. honestly, i've gotta admit tat i havent really been a good friend or even showed enough love to others. i had been selfish and i could have been better. i hadnt spent my time wisely. there were times when i was lukewarm and ignorant. but of course, i REMEMBERED the times when i had received, the times when LOVE become reality instead of fantasy. i can pictured the times when i was literally laughing and rolling on the floor. i remembered the moments when i was praying and tears rolled down my cheeks. i remembered lying on the bed thanking God for the person next to me.

so, as the year 2008 kicked in, i tried denying it, but it's a fact tat i'm 20 soon.
haha. pat's new year sms ran into my head. new year new bf. well.. perhaps.. perhaps not?! who knows?! but it's definitely the start of something new. yes. i havent accomplished a lot last year. and there's a lot to pick it up from.


MY RESOLUTIONS

to never ever take God for granted and still to draw closer to Him
to place Him first in everything
time management get my priorities right in all areas - people, studies, church, activities, job
be grateful for everything
see the bigger picture before acting rashly
have a pure and soft heart that's easy to mould.
this year, for me, i believe is a year of giving more than recieving.
it's my turn to be a blessing instead of continously being blessed. ( I REALLY WANNA PASS MY Ps!!!)
be proactive and initiative
in uni, i really wanna make a difference. may it be in the lives of others or watsoever. i wanna leave my mark
be a woman of prayer, faith and compassion
i wanna be there to lend my shoulders and ears. to be ever ready for others.
this year, i wanna be empowered to win a generation thru love

watever it is, i'm excited and full of hope. He is always there, guiding me through it and i never wanted it any other way to spend my year.

funny aint it how people's emotion can be affected by the silliest thing on earth!!!

yes. currently i am.
SEE MUN YEE IS FREAKED OUT TO THE BOMB-DIG-GI-DY BECAUSE OF A COMPANION IN HER ROOM!




a lizard is crawling abouts and i cant sleep!! it's way past my bed time!! >.<
God please help me!!!

Sign of God's goodness


Sometimes i really felt that i'm of no good. i tried. nothing happened. my efforts just arent good enough. words of flying daggers came back in return. i'm pierced. i'm disappointed. but God's hands seemed to always be around the corner.

this is just EXACTLY what i felt. and it came into my inbox this morning.

Today's Prayer
Dear God, Sometimes I feel like I have poured myself into something or someone, and worked and fought for a cause, only to see no fruits for my labors. It all seemed in vain. But I know that You can work in all of that to fulfill a greater purpose. Please, don't let the labor of my heart and hands be in vain. I pray that all I do would be as unto You and for a good purpose and eternal value. Please bless the works of my heart and hands for Your glory. Please empower me with wisdom and insight through Your Holy Spirit. Please guide me every step and every day, to have a part in reaching this world for You and ministering to those I love. In Jesus' name, amen.


disappointed? yes, i WAS but i'm not gonna give in. tired? yes, i WAS but i'll never give up.

Let the weak say i am strong
let the poor say i am rich
because of what the Lord has done in me.

i know i havent really been updating. yes yes yes. i admit. i'm lazy. hee :D so here's one :D

what have i been up to recently?? mmm.

oh yes. i've got some terrible news. i failed my driving exams for the second time. ARGGGHHH!! how annoying! and guess what i failed on this time. mirrors, stall, blah blah blah. it made me felt as though i'm never good enough. but really thank God this time for His grace and His peace. I wasnt super nervous or anything but perhaps, driving is not my grace for the time being. i know it's super hard for me to accept it cos i'm so keen to drive and be independent, stop troubling others.. but guys, sorry. it aint happening yet >< BIG BOO TO IT!!!! everyone has been super encouraging to me in this matter, telling me to try harder next time. thanks but i dun really want a next time.

anywayz... on a happier note, we celebrated mel's 20th birthday in eureka tower. apparently it's the tallest residential building in victoria or australia. well i'm not too sure but i sure know tat it was tall :P prior to the night, boss n i baked, since elisa's got her left over bits n pieces and she wants us to finish it..



so yea.. we baked and we carefully packaged it in a cereal box to disguise it with our green groceries bag. but according to mel post celebration, she kinda figured. but it was great to just spend time with people u love in the highest building, overlooking melbourne at night.



and then spending nights at jon, tim and aunty jane's house is the most hilarious thing ever!! when u have hard-core-punk-wannabe, super-nerd and seductive-female-watch-male-advertisor rocking up in his place placing cluedo till 4am. this is fun yo!






mmmm .. wat else wat else tat i can say?

oh oh oh. how can i miss this.

OCF THANKSGIVING

i'll just put a couple of photos for this. cos i think i've gained weight and i dun wanna conteminate ur eyeballs.



mel did my make-up. knowing me, i'll stuff up big time. she's a pro though





my leader





so sweet yea? my favourite photo! :p



and there was the triple J's farewell.
thank God that i managed to attend even though i had to work late. and really thank chenny for always being so willing to drive me around. because of him, not only i manage to reach home safely every sunday, but i manage to say my farewell and goodbyes. it was sad. but i'm thankful for the memories :D



julians



yes, i get to superpoke as in literally superpoke kuo hao in the party :P

not to forget, there was rach fi's birthday party with the theme - white.





and lots of dancing :P

another celebration that i attended was my cousin's new born baby party!! yes. i'm now an auntie.



oh oh oh!! we had our urbies outing too! tat was great deal of fun! more photos of tat on facebook.



yummmmmm... strawberries..... *DROOLS*









and we went to the beach as well.. it was good. i had lots of fun and i cant thank God enough for what He has given me.

i've been spending hours of my beauty sleep on this post. so u guys better appreciate it! haha. yet i've got so much more to say. my battery is running low though. both my body's battery and my com's .. hmm.. well.. perhaps more next time.

by the way have i mentioned tat i'm now working in max brener's - the chocolate shop? it was indeed God's provision. He really grants the desires of my heart and i'm soooo excited!! everything's good there. God is so worthy of my praise!

i'm sooo excited as well.. cos not only i just went to babysit my neighbour;s kids - i love them so so much! there's planetkids graduation this sunday. my girls are all graduating. so sadd... but it;ll be another fold of great blessings in their lives. something to look forward to.

u know wat? somehow i just felt as though i've got so much that i wanna to but i just kept forgetting bout the things that i want and need to do? does it ever occur to u or is it just me?

i'm coming home soon. i cant wait to see everyone. i'm excited. i'm excited for christmas too! this is gonna be a whole new christmas!

*sings carols with leaps of joy* signing off.

of all things big and small,
you're still the greatest of all.

i love you.

updates :)

PEGGIE and CHEL aare all graduates now! CONGRATS!! *wonder how long will it be till it's my turn ^.- *

ARE YOU GAME was definitely a blast :D :D
everyone is always so pretty when it comes to events like this.. no .. actually. i take that back. everyone is ALWAYS so pretty. EVERYDAY :) sometimes i just cant help but checking both the guys and girls out ;p but often times, my eyes are more fixed on the girls :) hehe.
i think for the next event i'm SOOO gonna sign up for smtg coz i was only doing the preparation stage work but not anything on the day itself.. and having said so.. i reached there early and was asking everyone if i could help out with anything all the time .. felt kinda bad disturbing ppl :) but really have to thank billy and couple of the guys for keeping me occupied :) :)
the night was really fun-packed and the message was fantastic!!
meiching got free movie passes! AWESOME :D

SUPPER after that was fun too :)
went with li - my sassy senior :P , peggie and her siblings - dom and shaun.
dom is so super cute!! and cheeky with his charm cards :p

God has been super good to me. i've just experienced His provision for my financial difficulties :D i was left with 100bucks short to pay my rent but God is so great that suddenly, not just my pay came it. i had something extra in my account. and it was enough to pay for my rent!!!!!! :) :) :)

how great is tat!!
i'm believing for more breakthroughs and for a job in either pancake parlour or max breners!!!!!!!! YEA!

oh. one more thing. i've just joined facebook. i'm like a noob. guess i'm gonna spend my whole day doing that!! :P ehehhee time kiiller and since i have no work today.. why not?! heee :D

i'm so inpsired and stirred seeing people getting baptised and i really cant wait for the day when it;s my turn :)
Chloe, Bea, William, Alvin, Ailing, amy, yiana, debbie and all - i'm so proud of u!!! i could really felt open heaven yesterday :D

iwentformyPsdrivingexamsandifailed.
worstthingeveristohaveyourinstructornexttoyouscoldingyouwhenyou'resadenough.










sigh, buckle up and be prepared for the next one i guess :)

CANT BELIEVE IT!

seriously. who would have thought, after so many years, so many acclimatisation, being so settled, i could be nostalgic!!! o.O and guess wat? i'm missing the people and things back home! honestly, this hadnt hit me for somewhile already, understanding that i'm actually slowing settling in and sooner than i thought, i may start calling this place HOMELAND. hahhaha. but the things is, i'd never get to do that as long as the key players in my life aint with me here.

yes. i was bored. i wasnt working yo! u cant really blame me for having too much time that i started flickering on the past photos or blog hopping right? my heart just dropped and butterflies flew into my stomach.

it had been long since i felt it this way .. when was the last time?? it wasnt even as worse when i first came back in June! perhaps it's because i'm missing everyone from both malaysia, high school and even uni!! T.T
*ouch* crap! i just sat on my finger! (how smart! >.<) PAINN!!

anywayz .. i was just flicking through the photos and .. i just miss everyone and everything. sorry bout being so whiney and i know eelin and trili always said i'm very "manja" :p well .. guess i am :D (SOMETIMES :P) but u know wat?? recently i've been
pondering on the topic - LOVE.



i was very challenged to "freely give as you have freely received". of course i'm very tempted to just throw the question - WHO LOVE ME, PLEASE SAY SO!! or WHY ARENT YOUR ACTIONS EVEN DROP ME THE SLIGHTEST HINT THAT YOU CARE... cos after rather being disconnected from the bigger circle, i realised that give a lil note or a brief love-ya-goodnight message on msn can make such a HUGE difference..

so big that it makes BIG seemed small :p
(well, not to mention outings and trips - they're the bombs)

surely, love isnt something to much to ask for. everyone needs to be loved, not just from the King, but also from people. It is surely more comforting than anything to be known as a Princess or Prince and even a CHAMPION in His eyes. When His Presence floods your heart, you're crowned with royalty. Its hard to explain but yea. However, let's come back to reality. WE ARE STILL HUMAN. There's still this part in us that craves for the love from peers or family or technically, from a person. Funny aint it how you can be so refreshed under His throne but yet you still miss the love language from people. Perhaps that why God created Eve.. perhaps it's because Adam needed company. a friend and a family. a companion. a someone.

[current song: i'll be there by mariah carey. our speech night song *sniff sniff* ]

yes. i do admit. i want to be loved. i was once told & even tested, by jo at mph! :p asking, what are the 5 languages of love.



no.. not the hand language. i went to search it cos i cant remember the 5th one :p


QUALITY time
physical touch
words of affirmation and encouragement
gifts
acts of service

jo asked me which area is my strength. honestly. i duno. cos i dun think i'm really good when it comes to love. all i want is to be loved. it is a very selfish of me. and perhaps i could come up with tonnes of justifications to it. but i wanna love more. i wanna be a person who GIVE.

i realised that for too many times, for too long, i've taken too many things for granted. too many people for granted.

i'm sorry and i'm trying to change that. help me.

though i feel like i'm being challenged to love EVERYONE despite everything, it's sometimes aint the easiest thing to do, especially after i'd been receiving quite a fair bit of negative reinforment (ooo .. psy jargon!) but hey, my God is a god who adds super into natural and my God gives me the strength that i need to overcome, so even though in psychology aspect, it requires damn much effort to change, but nothing is impossible for Him.

i know i such at replying emails or even sms.. phone calls and skypes are better with me :p .. but do know that my mind is always flooded with people close to my heart, k? and trust me, at the most random time of the day. i'm sorry i'm not good at expressing them.. but i just wanna say thank you to those who had always made me felt so comfortable at being myself that i'm able to just ..
wake up with super bad hair and still open the door for ya,
or constantly adjust my dress coz it's too loose
or simply call you up when i need a ride home after dark
or just random and spontaneously play sports with
or go in your car on a rainy day when ur wipers aint working
or feel the warmth in my heart though we're like miles apart

thank u for those timely phone calls and sms-es. i love u i love u.

so for now, please, grab my hand, and let's go for a spin - i know mandy loves doing it! :p

the previous post was a lil incomplete. been trying to upload more photos to it but somehow it aint working well .. so . i'll prolly go back to it later.

just a few mental notes.

i tot this quote from some movie trailer was pretty cool.
"the dimmest (or smallest light) will still shine in darkness" - i want to shine :) like carebears ;p

i think i'm being attacked in the area of insecurity >.< it sucks but i believe by the love of Jesus, i can overcome it. perhaps it's PMS or watever, it is definitely an issue that hits today;s girls and hey.. i cant help it k when i'm actually and constantly being surrounded by super pretttay girls :P but definitely.. my honour mann.. and i believe when i overcome it.. it'll be for God's glory and would definitely help me relate wit girls from similar situation! YEA!!

my sis is arriving tmr :D YAY!! great stuff to look forward to!

God is challenging me areas tat i was once very comfortable with. but thank God for choosing me :)

matt 7 : 7 ask and you will recieve, seek and you shall find, knock and the doors will be opened for you.
this verse has not only been reoccuring in planetkids but yesterday as i went to my neighbour's hse to babysit.. it popped on the tv!!! my goodness... :D

HAD BEEN A VERY HAPPY CHILD :)

loads had been happening and i hadnt really had a chance to blog about .. so .. here's some catching up photos :) but really sorry though .. i missed my old camera.. better batt life and quality.. but still .. this camera will do for the time being >.< think about the bright side yo! it's better than none! :D


first up .. WHAT IS was a blast!!!! somehow everyone was so dressed up and it was fantastic!!!



we went for supper after that :P



and my favourite moment - icecream time :D



so guys!!! better not miss the next upcoming event - ARE YOU GAME? on the 19th oct, melbourne high school!! IT'S GONNA BE OFF THE ROOF!

after that, on the very next day .. there's --- lake entrance joy jedis outing :)

big applause to stevictory and caterrrriffic

a shot prior to the 4hr journey







fish n chips... AAAAA











thanks for having me in the trip!! it was such a blasttttt :D when i reached home. i just couldnt help but have the warm fuzzy love feeling in my heart :D


theeennnn .. last sat ..we had our own 3-some outing :)









Readyyyy.



Jump













though sometimes i had the thought (negative bad thoughts) regarding about not having many close friends- which is rather not true when i actually start counting :P hehehehe.. I came to realise that i am actually a very much loved child <3