IS IT TOO MUCH TAT I'M ASKING FOR?

firstly befor i forget... HAPPY GRADUATION to all the form5s and yr 12s~~!!! .. i guessed it must be really emotional to go through this period thinking tat u've actually finished high school and now moving on to ur next step ...to ur bright future .. expecting challenges and overcoming them .. as for me .. i'm sure tat if i were one of them .. i'll be crying like a baby .. missing all my beloved darling frens .. and ermm ..still miss them >.< but anyhow. . good luck in all ur exams ya ??

well .. back to me .. hey! this is my blog .. of course it's about me! :P hehe
i'm alrite ... being a bhse captain is so much fun .. especially when it comes to room allocations
i dun get to decide everyone's room ... and they wont complain anything ..
the committee is so united .. so is our year .. we just do everything together and open up our thoughts .. no bitching behind ppl's back and no way we're gonna let others be involved
we think about each other's feeling .. and we at least try to understand ppl .. puttin our legs in their shoes
it's not all about power .. it's about fair n just .. its about ppl not the committee itself oni
see how selfless we all are!
i'm just managing so well with this room allocation thingy when there's completely no issues at all!
i get to sleep in peace and dry my eyes everynite
i get all the understandings tat i want and i know who to turn to when i'm down
i'm so strong in will and i;m very confident tat i'll pull it thru :D

hahaha!~!! so funny and sound so perfect eh??? nothing could go gone .. let me tell u .. all these are just simply plain irony!! i'm being sarcastic! .. it's all so ironic! >.<

seriously is it too much tat i'm asking for?
yesterday i was just telling megan ... all i asked for everytime if there's a chance to wish for something is to have everyone happy and healthy .. i somehow rememebered telling mandy the same thing .. welll ..she laughed and said tat no wonder my wish never come true.. well .. i guessed she's kinda rite .. tat is so not possible .. i give up now .. should i start to think of another one now tat i dun have faith in it?? .. but i still cant think of anything better to ask for .. this is wat i really want!!
guess ppl dun usually get wat they want .. and i'm one of those ppl

well .. i just want the room allocation thingy to be done in a fair .. democratic and just way so tat everyone will be happy and will come to an agreement .. leaving the room in a pleased and happy-with-wat-i-get mood .. instead of leaving the room feeling grumpy and then start bitching! .. i also want the girls to come to me or the committee if they are unhappy bt anything so tat there is actually something tat we can do about it ..say trying to fix it up or something.. instead of just .. talkin behind our back and crying over spilt milk! .. i want everyone to understand .. and learn to accept the fact tat we live in a community .. we have to compromise .. and negotiate .. we are creatures who are filled with emotions not desire .. we creeps for happiness but not earning it in a dirty way .. we have to try to stand in others positions and look thru their eyes~ .. see wat they see .. but not stabbing her even tho she's crying for help .. rite?? yet .. the human race is really biased and unjust .. no matter how hard we tried .. the selfishness and the favoutism is implanted from the day tat u are born .. can we overcome it in peace ?? i duno .. would the ppl understand ?? i duno ... aikz ..

anywayz.. i still wanna thank god for everything he has done.. giving me frens and family to support me thru tough times like this .. it aint easy for me .. nor everyone else to go through times of examinations and times of commitments.. it aint easy to face our emotions and let our rational brains to lead us .. but i still wanna say a big thank u to those who had given me the strength and the will to pull it thru .. and to believe tat tmr will be a better day!

PLEASE OR TO BE PLEASED?
It's Never Easy

well .. lots of things had been happening and spinning on my head .. good things.. bad things.. happy thoughts .. sad incidents.. great joy .. and hurtful desire .. each n every lil thing.. but the main thing that is in my head now .. is the responsibilities of being a boarding hse captain .. and i'm sure the committe or the vice captain would have their heads spinning now too .. as it's the time of room allocation .. it's not an easy job having to please everyone and make it fair and just .. when we thought that we had found the fairest and just way to deal with it .. ppl come arousing with disastifaction .. when the committees do this .. the complaints shoot ahead .. yet .. the most annoying bit is that the opinions or "suggestions" are not aimed at us .. they would either talk behind our back or just snap it straight at the head of bhse .. when we couldnt work it out between ourselves.. wat can we do to help u when u urself dun voice ur opinions to us?? ..

it's just too hard to please everyone ..
i'm stucked in between .. when it doesnt even concerns me! ..
but the responsibilities are laid on my shoulders >.<

aikz .. it's not like anyone reading my blog would tell the stubborn heads or bitch to talk and face me.. >.<

WAT CAN i DO TO MAKE U HAPpy?

some photos to share :)

i'm fine now .. dun worry! ..went for retail therapy to release stress :P so ya ..
enjoy




the 2005/2006 boarding hse committee as bouncers on "The Nite of the Nights" celebrity themed nite .. with fat tummies and cool sunnies :P





the TELETUBIES~!!! so cute and funny .. they should have won best dressed but then there wasnt enough pressie for 4 to split .. so scary spice won it in the end



my lil nephew .. whom i stayed with during my september hols .. so so cute ya?

MUCK UP DAY

today is yr 12 final day of school .. which to them is known as muck up day .. for us .. getting mucked up by the yr 12s! ..
well .. it was a great heapz of fun .. but rite now .. i'm not really in the mood to talk about the fun stuff..

i'm currently suffering from boredom and pessimism!! >.<
i duno y but yet .. yea.. i'm feeling really shitty cos i stuffed up my chem test and i couldnt find anyone to play sports with me! >.< i do know y !
i dun feel like doing anything productive.. aka hw .. and aikz.. so screwed!!
all i feel like doing is to scream and shout the throat out of my lungs (not using my common sense here)
well ... who cares?!! at least i can release the stress that is in me ..
but tears wont come out
and things dont work out
i'm left here still .. bored bored and lastly still bored >.<

well ... sinking into the pessimism .. >.<
i used to think that i'm the luckiest gal on world ..
(i kinda still think so .. but yea .. )
i'm stucked in dilemma now ..
wondering .. who am i? why am i here ? does anyone care?
i used to be able to feel free to just knock on the door
bang on ur head or even yell or laugh at ur face ..
and spill out all the deep thoughts
in my head or in my soul
i know that there would always be someone there
to lift me up when there seemed to be no one else
i thought tat i was very loved
but now .. i'm doubting .. were those sensational things oni in my dreams?
can this still happen again
when everyone is so engaged
with the hustle bustle of their own lives
and the stress that mounting up

i dun wanna be a burden
i dun wanna be a weight
i dun wanna be a disturbance
nor an annoyance
i wanna be a angel, a cheerful angel
who brings joy and :) when there's despair
i wanna be someone who take the grief and pain ..
and put it on my shoulder
then i'll hide and weep alone .. in the dark corner ..
secretly .. silently .. and pray that .. shortly ..
i'll be able to stand again.

RANDOM THINGS
oohhh!! 3 posts in a day!! shall break my record!! :P

yupz .. having spare now .. n things just kept popping in my head .. oh .. before i forget
special shoutouts to..
KAMYU.. happy birthday !!! may u have an awesome day!!
JON .. good luck in ur oral today
CX .. good luck in ur chink oral on thurs

swimming sports was held last tues
i was supposed to be in 2 events.. but i freaked out .. knowing tat i wouldnt be as good as others.. so .. better not embarrass myself in front of the whole school ..so i let the better swimmers take my spot .. :P
tat day .. me mak and mandy were full on slacking the whole day .. went to msac and did nothing related to sports other than cheering on for lee.. :p

rat disection again on bio class
thank godness i dun haf to touch it cos it was disected by the teachers .. all we had to do were just to look and observe ..we looked at the reproductive system of the male and the female .. we even looked at the pregnant rat with 12 fetuses .. GROSS!~!!
aikz .. GROSS GROSS GROSS

RELIEF .. now in com room .. blogging :P

now tat i dun hav to go to convo lessons anymore .. since oral exams are over. . i've earned myself an extra spare :) yay!!!

well .. i've got a couple of things done since i hardly come bloggin .. oh ya ..sorry guys for replying u guys asap .. but it's in progress k ??

VALEDICTORY and CELEBRATION DINNER
valedictory dinner was held last friday .. and celebration dinner was yesterday .. both the dinners are for the yr12 to celebrate and as well to be recognised each and everyone as a special gal .. it was a time to be togther before they graduate! .. oh yea .. their final day is this upcoming friday .. muck up day!!! which means the yr12 ex-com's present ... >.< aikz .. havent even gotten any! shit!
anywayz .. u must be wondering ..wat the hell am i doing in the yr 12 celebration dinner .. i had to serve and clean up (literally as a waiter) in the dinners becos i'm in the senior committee and the bhse committee.. the valedictory dinner was held at school ..and the celebration dinner was in the bhse dining room .. valedictory dinner was helped out by all the senior committee .. megan and amanda and lots more were there .. we just had to collect the plates .. nothing much and megan had to clean up the glasses .. haha ..she broke like 5 of them!! hehehe :P so funny .. i think she broke the most in a nite :P and we got to eat the left over desserts like apple tart and cheese cake .. and fruits.. SO FATTENING .. but they were yummy ~!! :P who cares! .. ya .. then .. we collected almost everything and had nothing else to do .. so we just stood there and watched the yr 12 dance .. they given out awards and danced like mad .. someone pole danced!!! :P heheh ..they saw us standing there and started to corner us!.. so funny! .. they were imposing sick moves on us .. but we were just laughing our heads off :P they then invited us to join them .. we felt awkward .. and ran away :P ..hehe valedictory dinner was something very different and it's sure something to look forward to ..
celebration dinner was simply so good!!! :) the food especially!.tolebrone moose .. beef (nicely done .. not full cook) ..juice (not water!). i had to serve the yr12 boarders ,.. eikz. . serving again!.. but then it was really good .. we get to nibble something and we also had our committee meeting deciding the nite of the nites shit as well as room arrangements.. i guessed the food was really good cos ppl asked for seconds.. it was a realy nice and cosy dinner ..everyone dressed up nicely and the dining room was set up nicely .. candles ..deco .. and nice music .. as if u were in the restaurant . .. guess wat?? i dint drop anything on anyone!! :P .. felt so sad tat the yr12 are leavin us soon .. and i'll miss them terribly .. >.< which means tat next year .. we're the leaders and i'll no longer be under the loving and nurture of my beloved jie jie - didi .. thankz so much di ..i love u!!
(psst.. she wasnt at the celebration nor the valedictory dinner .. wonder y..hmmm)

IN THE LIBRARY :)

well ..hmm... felt like it's been a while since i last blogged. . so here's a brief outline of wat i did over the past week~!!! hehe :P

guess waT?? i'd done my chinese oral exams@!!! :) one exam done .. 6 more to go! .. aikz!! .. ya .. i did tat yesterday..
CHINESE ORAL EXAM
0550
woke up unexpected early in the morning .. when i was supposed to oni get up at 6.45 .. which was really early already ..considering the fact tat i alwayz wake up like 11.30 in the weekends :P ya .. but it was alrite .. i guessed i was really nervous .. and we wanted to avoid the traffic and not arrive late ..
0715
we left the bhse .. elena and her mum kindly offered to pick us up :) thanks aunty and elena~!! :) .. in the car .. i think everyone was really nervous .. so we hardly tok .. :P
0800
arrived the ukrainian church .. oour exam location .. how weird ? taking a chinese oral exam in a catholic church ! .. oh well ..we were early ..WAY early .. so elena's mum suggested to bring us to mcD to calm ourselves and have something to eat .. YAY ~!! food's always good!
0815
reached mcD .. chatted abit .. kimo and i ate apple pie~ ... yumm~!!! lovin it!
0855
went back to the church and get organised .. registered with the teacher in charge.. she;s an italian :P quite lenglui too!! :P met others like ivy .. nicole .. and melody .. surprisingly she was in skirts!! :P and also not to forget vicky came super early as well when her exam was like at 10 ... with her parents
0920
the first badge of oral examinees :P went into the rooms and prepared for their exams .. tense and suspense in the air ! >.< nicole ivy and mel .. (can still feel the nerves!)
0935
the italian teacher asked us to get ready and assembled .. told us where we were supposed to be and asked us to sit on the chair outside the classroom
0936
found my room .. room 7 .. sat on the chair outside .. saw nicole on the way in .. she said it was alrite and she was in my room .. so i was hoping tat my examiners were nice and approachable ..
0937
"breathe..breathe" .. was the oni phrases tat kept repeatin in my head .. everyone else went into their assigned rooms and i even heard elena started talking while i was like still sitting on the chair and waiting to be invited in .. i was literally shivering and so damn nervous!! .. i couldnt calm myself even tho i tried my very best .. i couldnt pull myself together .. so i was praying and telling myself to be calm and smile .. and kept telling myself tat i'll be fine ..
0940
out of no where .. this door behind me opened .. and i was called in ..
0941-0955
oral exams in progress ..
was really nervusos initially .. fingers were like twisting ..cold sweating and thank god i had stopped shivering .. the general talk was really wasnt wat i prepared they asked all bout school and i hardly prepared alot on it!! shit .. now i'm a bit worried.. ahh ..wat if i stuffed up ??? hope not .. but anywayz .. the detailed study bit .. i was a bit more confident in it .. they asked most of the stuff tat i prepared. . :P
0956
"xie xie" .. and tat ended my first ever assessed chinese oral exam.. it was done~!! :)

let's get the week kicking~!! :P

well .. after the weekend being stuck in the bhse .. i get to understand the fact tat staying in the boarding house during weekend .. will only make u FAT!!! .. i procrastinate the whole of saturday .. and ate most of the sunday .. for those who are expecting me to go back thin .. DREAM on~! .. ahhh!!! FAT faT d`~~ ... >.<

there wasnt anything exciting happening on monday .. other than on monday nite .. we had the committee meeting .. i hosted it?~! .. we discussed about couple of stuff like the themed dinner .. and the yr12 pressies .. and stuff. . so it was alrite .. it went pretty well .. with too many suggestions tat we came up with a elimination way of choosin the things .. everyone was very co-operative .. i somehow still feel abit condescended when tammi is around .. she seemed to be abit dominant .. but that alwayz had been her personality .. well .. thank goodness i've still got mandy and leanne by my side .. but i'm not gonna be a captain tat;s taking sides and splitting things into groups ..i want this yr12 to be unified :P not talking behind ppl's back ~ :P .. it;s hard to do . but it's my aim~ :P (bercita cita besar!! )
we came up with the themed nite .. called "the nite of the nites - celebrity nite"
there is gonna be a voting held tmr~ .. in the dining room .. for there's 4 awards ..
like the katie holmes award - likely to get married to a celebrity
the john howard awards - to be a president
the desperate house wives award - to be a hse wife wit 10kids
the cookie monster award - eats the most cookies!! ..reckon mak will win it :P
hahah :D
sounds alrite eeh ??? maybe a bit lame .. but it's just all these lame things that needs preparations and discussions k??? like even today .. tammi and i REHEARSED to make an announcement to tell ppl about this thingy .. well .. it's gonna be alrite i hope..haha ..oh ya .. bout the announcement .. we even had leanne and mandy to do the drum rolls .. a funny way .. wit ur tongue going "RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR" and the pan from the kitchen going "tinggggg !"
mandy had helped heaps with things like making posters .. buying the gifts and also making the certificates :P thank u so much~!!! well ..seemed like things are all well underway .. hope it's gonna be a good nite :P

ok ..enough bout the nite of the nites.. :P
we also discussed about getting gifts for the ex-committee ... fuiyo~.. it aint easy getting a gift for 6 gals when suggestions kept coming from another 6 gals!! i always find getting a decent gift a challengin job .. now .. 6 the amount .. and it aint easy to come to a agreement .. but we finally did .. but then the plan is hindered .. due to postage~.. ahh .. have to think of another gift .. any suggestions?

we also had a short meeting with the ex-com just then .. just had a casual yet a bit formal things to talk thru .. it was alrite .. they gave us lots of tips on how to do things and how to organise the upcoming event for next year .. it was good .. but i would wanna catch up with didi more ... she's like a big sis .. and i wanna ask more things from her~ .. :)

to do list :
- organising rooms for the yr12 - already recieving opinions ..(not from my yr somemore .. but it's a good suggestion )
- boarders jumper
- the celebrity themed nite - nite of the nites voting
- ............................ - actual dressed up and red carpet nite
- orientation week
- boarders weekend
- valecdictory dinner help out in serving
- celebration dinner - help out
- committee tshirt
- ex-com gifts
- social for next year

the list continues!!!

dint know tat there' so much to do as a captain!!!!!

interesting website for those who can read chinese. go test for your 'real' age ^^ . have fun!


http://www.xlzx.com/xlcs/zy32.htm


my results were this ..

鉴定结果
您的心理年龄16岁

与您实际年龄差-1岁


幼稚度80％


成熟度32％


老化度19％

FIRST WEEK OF TERM
n i cant wait for the hols to come~

well ..the fourth term kicked started off with tonnes of work and essays due .. SACS and tests!! .. it wasnt any better when our english teacher was sick and was taken over by the yr 12 teacher who had no idea of wat we were doing! .. she simply expects us to know everything when we know so lil!! >.< gonna have to work harder .. not to forget tat chinese is getting harder and more stressful !! with just a week to go then my oral exams!!! hard core! >.< kept telling myself to stay calm .. and just go in there n bullshit bout chinese tea confidentally !! :P hope my trick works!

and ya .. i went for this all school badminton championship and got thrashed~!! there were some really good ppl~!! among the wesley school's team ..they already had 2 state player .. then .. at this bush-country team .. they were big .. massive and strong~ gosh@!! leanne, cathreen, jess n i represented plc ..well .. we werent as good as them but yea.. it was overall a great experience ... i couldnt stop blaming myself in the last match when i was leading 6-1 and i lost !!! arrhhh!! i tot tat i could win her but i dint!! very annoying ..and the rules were just plain stupid .. normally .. we play best of 2 out of 3 games .. but then .. this one ..there wasnt a rematch .. one game determines it all~!! >.< oh well .. probably the slacking mood and laziness over the hols tat i wasnt as fit (not tat i am) as before the hols .. or maybe because i havent played or do any sports so long detiorates my performance tat day.. oh well .. it was over anywayz .. but the experience was awesome.. i get to know cathreen leanne and jess abit better ... i used to be very prejudiced against cath .. becos she's seemed so snobbish .. but then .. after a long chat with her while waiting for our cab who took an hour plus to arrive.. i realised tat she is really nice :) overall .. we came 3rd .. not too bad .. but there was oni 4 teams! :P

went out for dinner with the head of bhse .. fearnie n fearno with the new bhse committee at sofias ,camberwell .. an italian restaurant~!! was BLOATING after tat!! seriously!! ate so much! think i gained more than i use! >.< cant get rid of the fats!! >.< arhh .. had couple of pastas .. pizza .. icecream .. and they made me order hot choc too!! omg!! my roomies and frens actually did ask me to dapao .. but when i was thinking of them .. fearnie called the leftover as "scraps" which kinda hindered me .. n in the end .. i dint take away any .. oh well .. treat them chocolate instead :P we discussed of wat a committee should plan ahead and think about .. well .. nothing much actually .. other than term 4 theme dinner and the yr12's farewell .. thinking ahead about the yr12 jumpers as well .. want it to be cool and memorable :) hehe :P actually.. i'm quite enjoyin being a bhse captain .. i really wanna thank all those who have faith in me and believe in me~ .. i wanna ppl proud of me .. and make our year a good one.. do u think i can?? well i hope so! but i do need encouragements! :P

ya.. and just had my oral trialz with 2 teachers from random schoolz. .. wow~!! i managed to do it! .. it wasnt great but glad tat i dint stumble over myself as much as my first sac .. haha. . well .. the teachers were very nice to start off with .. and the questions tat they asked werent the ones tat i prepared .. but i did bullshit a lot~!! :P special thanks to chunwei tho .. he asked me to think as if i'm speaking to him while doing it. . i think that eventually help .. not tat i'm thinking alot of him .. just a way to calm me down i guess .. oh well .. the real oral exam is in a week .. monday the 17th~ .. a day before chongshen's bday!! ahhh >.< damn scared!! but i get to miss a day of school cos the oral exam is in north melbourne~ .. ya mann .. so formal and so far away .. but luckily elena was nice enough to pick me up there .. thank u~!! wish me luck ya ?? :P

u guys back in malaysia .. study hard for ur spm k ???
we all work hard together k?? i prepare my oral and catch up with my hw .. u do more revision k/?? gambateh!

HOLZ OVER ..
Another new term .. another new beginning :)

well .. real sorry for not really been bloggin over the holz .. i simply realised that i intend not to blog when i have the access to msn ~!! well .. now tat msn is totally out of the list (school doesnt allow the usage of msn) ya .. i'm back to bloggin :P the way to update ppl who may be interested in my life :P

after vicky's party .. i moved from my guardian's hse to my cousin's place. . a really comfy place to stay where i could just to wateva n felt so free :) i felt very welcomed and had this sense of belonging :) ya .. and the best thing is tat i had no curfews!!! at home i still have to go home before 8 .. but over there~!! fuiyo~ syok! haha .. but i still felt bad to be troubling my lovely cousin ,francis(who always offers me yummy food :P he opens a restaurant here u see) , his wife , ivy (pharmacist who always picks me up from the train station at nite) and their cute lil son, leon ( 4yrs old .. cute and funny~ brought heaps of laughter) i slept in the originally study room .. wit the com just sitting there .. basically was really hard fighting the temptation of not going online and do my hw .. ended up not doing heaps of work ~! gotta do lots of catch up now .. *yea rite .. still bloggin here then huh? *

anywayz .. as most of u probably would have known .. i worked in the fun fair.. Royal melbourne show .. selling showbags. . aka. toys for kids .. working there was considerably fun initially ..seeing all the kids and their parents .. and just making them happy simply makes me happy too :P the first day i had an early day off.. went home at 4 .. so it wasnt tat tiring .. but the following days .. when the parents somehow seemed a bit grupmy and unreasonably .. and standing at the counter for about 7to 8 hours a day .. i would end up going home FLAT out! dint have the energy to do anything else other than had a shower and went straight to bed ~!! :P hehe .. it aint easy to earn money .. by the end of each day .. my legs were so tired .. mann .. i had to wash them with hot water to ease the tiredness and hot water encourages blood circulation apparently .. :P haha .. well well .. but i did get an hour break a day .. to either eat my meals or just have a break.. most of the time .. i would walk around the show ..looking at all the stalls which sold really interesting things .. like food .. (ohya .the had the hotdog thingy tat we ate at taiwan .. i couldnt rmb the name.. neh.. the hotdog wrapped with bread n then fried . ya.. that one. .can someone help me out wat its name is again ? :P ) toys .. accessories.. perfume~!! so much to see!! :P seriously.. the place was HUGE~ n by the end of the show .. i still didnt manage to see ALL of it~! .. haa .. but ya .. met jonathan in the show .. he was literally surrounded by gals ! hehehe :P he said tat he wanted to visit me while i was working .. n i think i did give him clear instructions .. but maybe he was too distracted to locate me :P anywayz.. it was oni coincident tat i saw him .. during my break .. i came out of the food market (stop thinkin tat i'm such a pig ~ it was just coincidentially) .. ya,, and i was seeing this guy .. so familiar .. jumping up n about .. yup .. it's him .. jonathan .. i dint manage to check out his gals friends . .. cos he was busy pinching me!!! @.o .. but .. ya.. he must have been pretty "attractive" for there are about 9 gals there!! haha ~! :P
then .. during my day off.. i met up with alex, jason and their fren, jeena (alex's erhem .. so called "fren".. quite pretty :P ) who came up from geelong .. to go to the melbourne show .. i dint manage to go there wth them cos i was still sleeping :P too tired from work the other day .. but we had lunch together n went to the BOOKSHOP together:P hhaa.. so guai .. spent bout an hour or so there.. hehe ..
the last day of work .. phew .. was awesome .. cos by the end of it .. i was so sick n tired of it .. it was so repetitive >.< .. so not challenging~!! but was kinda sad too .. cos i met some awesome ppl there ... they were all very nice .. but i duno y .. i was stupid enough not to ask for their contacts~! omg!! well .. too bad .. hopefully i can see them there again next year .. well . i believe in a thing call faith u see :P

there goes my second week .. working my ass off.. .hopefully i will get a high pay :) the experience was good :)

my third week went flying by .. i tot tat it would be a catchng up week .. since i dint do anything much on the 1st and 3rd week :P but it dint really go as i planned .. i had to keep in mind tat my oral exam would be in less than 2 weeks when shcool reopens .. and 10essays from chinese ... maths hw .. and a persuasive essay due rite at the beginning of term~~ GOISH .. how could i finish all of them ??? so .. i told myself.. i had to do them~!! no matter wat! .. yea.. i did them .. with lots of procrastinating ~!! :P haha :P i did few chink essays the first day .. went on line most of the time .. talked on the phone .. enjoying my privacy like no body's business :P but thru on9 ... i found out tat there had been lots of things going on .. mostly .. bad news. . i sometimes really felt tat i'm so useless.. seeing them in so much pain .. but yet there is nothgin much tat i could do to undo the pain~ >.< hate myself!!! arhhh!! but someone special told me tat it actually help alot by just being a listener ... true .. but yet .. there is so much more tat i wanna do than be a listener .. i wanna put a smile on their faces again .. but i dont know how .. >.<
ya .. anywayz .. megan went to switchfoot's consert on wed .. she actually asked me to go with her. . it was a bit too sudden .. i wasnt really prepared n i dint really wanna spend so much on them when i hardly heard of their songs.. so i decided not to.. but i went out with megan n grace .. the whole morning we were trying to find how to go to the riverbank , southbank to have lunch .. somehow or another.. we jsut couldnt.. !! the trams jz kept going on the wrong track! .. or should i say tat we kept going on the wrong tram! :P .. aikz .. ahha .. end up going to eat dimsum .. yumcha in chinatown .. yummm ... while they were at the concert.. i went to the library .. (So guai leh :P )
WEEKEND .. i spent it with my primary frens who are a pair of twins .. a guy, samuel and sheryl ... they are currently studying in sydney .. and they came up to melbourne to spend their holz. . so happened that jon had knew them since young ..they were childhood ffrenz.. so we all went out together.. with jon n i as hosts~@ :P hehehe :P jon's parents were here too .. so they treated all of us lunch .. havin a promise tat we will treat them hokkien mee from the twins and char keoy teow from me back :P hahah .. anywayz we brought the twins to chadstone .. the biggest shopping mall .. ermm .. then boxhill .. for dinner .. well actually .. in short .. i did spend quite a lot of time with them .. 3days! went to city.. melbourne central .. hiiiii :) - selah just came n wrote this RANDOMLY :P - did lots of walking around .. watched 3 movies .. sky high .. wedding crashers .. and cinderalla man .. and even took sticker photos!! i had to admit tat the sticker photos werent tat nice and partly it was becos of me! :P

holz ended with a walk by the riverbank with the twins.. the lights.. the smile .. the experience and everything .. WAS AWESOME :)

My japanese name is 藤原 Fujiwara (wisteria fields) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations).
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HOLZ UPDATE

hols had started bout 2 weeks ago .. to be exact .. about 13days ago.. yupz .. meaning tat i havent blog since then .. wow~! :P just felt as if something is missing in me when i havent blogged .. something tat doesnt feel rite .. gosh! i'm addicted! *gasp!* hahaha .. nah .. just that i felt obliged to blog..geeshh... so here i go..

well .. hols been alrite so far .. well .. on friday .. was really glad tat the last day of term has finally arrived :) seriously needing tat break .. but the fact tat i'm not going home till dec really depresses me .. but now.. as i'm writting this blog .. i've actually survived 2 weeks here~! wow!! amazing heh? lots of ppl think so too .. even me myself! :P hahah . . anywayz .. ya .. was still busy packing on fri after school when half the bhse had gone .. aikz .. got a ride from joyce's sis down to sis and met up with muah daddy in his hotel~!! phew. . i nearly knocked on the wrong door~!! he actually sent me an sms telling me tat he was in room 316 .. somehow .. i tot tat he was in room 313 .. n thankfully i checked with the receptionist .. and fuii.. hehe .. found dad in the rite room in the end. .. hehe ..phew ~!!
had heaps of fun when dad was around ..brought him to the good restaurant and he pays for everyhting :P guess i'd gained few kgs when dad was here ... brought him to vic market to buy me fruits and also he needed to get them for the ppl tat we were gonna visit... ya .. we went to my cousin, seng's hse .. and his grannies hse .. just to say hi .. caught up with leong as we went around the city and had lunch at this chinese restaurant ..where we were their one n oni customers when we were there!! fuiyo!! haha ..when we walked in we repeated questioned ourselves whether was the restaurant open .. ohmygosh~! it was so yummy .. dad said he read it in some magz ..no dount it was so scrumptious then :P
went for dinner with my guardian with dad and leong .. did all the random things like "surveying the shopping market" and stoll around city .. watched tv at hotel :P ya .. had breaky (yumcha) with couz francis and he invited us to his hse .. he offered dad the ride to the airport too .. :P i think it's very nice of him :) and he also offered me to stay at his hse .. (which is where i am now) aikz .. was so sad when dad had to leave .. i was at the airport ..with my luggage at the boot of the car. . airticket n passport in my bag .. yet i wasnt the one flying .. hugged dad goodbye and yea .. recollect myself n left ~ NEARLY had tears rolling down but didnt~

staying at my guardian's place wasnt such a pleasant experience .. everything i did . i felt so restricted .. i couldnt have easy access to internet or the phone or anything ..i had to behave myself in a formal .. goodie goodie gal kinda way .. i hate it! well .. hate is a word too strong .. errmmm .. maybe just dislike it .. being constrained and everything ~ ..ya ... would prefer tat i stayed in the bhse .. hmm sounded like i'm contradicting myself eh?? but then in the bhse i could do wateva tat i felt like doing.. at least i was at ease .. but in my guardian hse ..she seemed to be very particular about things .. and yea. . i just felt tat i was really unwelcomed .. or maybe i was just thinking too much and comparing too much bout things .. or maybe it was just becos tat her sister in law was coming and she was stressed .. or maybe it was bcos tat she was going to tasmania and she dint feel tat she prepared for it ..or maybe it was becos of me not liking to stay under the roof of others who i'm not tat close to.. or maybe ..wateva .. it's gotta be my fault .. well ..watever it was . it was the past.. i'm not staying with her now .. and to be frank ..it wasnt tat bad .. just tat i have to constrain myself and behave properly .. no fooling around .. yea .. maybe i should start learning to behave :P

Vicky's Party
vicky's party was obviosly doubtless fun~!it was a sleepover party :P everyone had to be dressed in pyjamas :P there was about 18of us who went there .. inc megan nessa grace mel tina steph seeann ash janine shirlz and more .. see ann was very kind to bring me to vickz' hse when i arrived at the train station .. it was raining too .. :P double gratitute to her! :P anw .. ya .. we pigged out while waitin for everyone to arrive .. everyone took the eforrt to dress up .. was amazing :P haha :P we played some games.. firstly we were divided into groups .. in my group .. we had jess elena tina nessa and me .. then we played games like tressure hunt .. (hunting for photos) ..our group had to hunt for vicky's photo .. it was like everywhere~ so funny when we were actually tearing her hse down .. looking in basically everywhere .. behind the cupboard ..even underneathe the toilet bowl ~!! gosh ..so desperate .. in the end .. i was laughing like xiao poh .. our group won the first round but in the second game .. proved tat we werent as smart as others.. in who wants to be a millionaire ..we just raised our hands even tho we dint know the answer just to make sure that the other team wouldnt get 2 marks~ how evil .. but it was really funny tho ..cos a wild guess of mine got the answer ~!! :P jehehe .. and the last game was like shiraq .. was really funny when i saw the hostesses act .. some were too obvious and some were just too vague to guess.. :P the classic answer .. was elena's hipppooopppootaaammuuss ~!! so funny! but she got it~! well .. after tat was just plain playing random games like 007(i tot them how to play it.. the taiwan game tat long bean tot us) and also card games :P at about 1smtg ..we were stil watching movies like zoolanders and bride n prejudice .. was so tired ~!
but slept at 4/5 .. gosh .. wonder how the ppl manage to wake up at about 8 the next day .. cos i oni woke up at about 10 :P .. vicky'd parents were very nice n frenly..i had a great time at vicky's place :) thankz vicky for taking the trouble to organise everything :)

HOLZ ARE HERE

with the end of term come whizzing around .. aikz .. havent started packing yet!! and have to get my butt off this bhse .. staying with either my guardian and my cousins .. with not so much of convenience or privacy .. not being able to do wateva i feel like and stuff .. and the most annoying part is tat .. i'm not going home ~!!!! >.< i wanna go home now ..
mak and mandy went on the plane as i type this.. aaarrrrgggghhhhh ... i wanna go home ..

but thinking on the bright side.. no one would be free to play with me .. cos everyone would be too busy with their trials .. which reminded me to wish u guys all the best in the trialz ... i know tat most of u guys are really stressed out .. but still GAMBATEH orh!!! ..

so ... 3 weeks here .. wat can i do ..i have these options :
- work (duno where yet)
- good news : daddy's coming over for the weekend .. for business trip
- staying over at cousins and guardian .. (does that count as something to look forward to?)
- maybe going over to joyce's place with sally to just mess up her hse and get fat by baking cookies or cooking .. (obviously my role is to eat !! )
- wat really worries me is tat .. how am i gonna do my laundry and stuff??? how ? do i still have computer access as convenient as in the bhse?? would i be a hastle to the ppl whom i'll be staying with???

i duno

but so glad tat daddy;s coming :) yay!!!

trialz gambate!

THE WEEKEND

friday nite .. HOTPOT and STEAMBOAT nite :)
well ... at first i went to play badminton with megan and jess considering the fact tat i overslept and missed the training and finals are coming up soon .. so yeah .. need lots of practice to catch up .. so yea .. played till 5 .. then i caught the tram and went to knox to meet up with mandy and mak .. they were shopping there .. but i wasnt really in a mood to shop .. then i suddenly remembered that i needed to buy bday pressie for someone special ... so yea .. got a roxy wallet and a ripcurl belt. . anywayz .. do u know tat there's this really yummy popcorn shop in knox city??? they were sensational!! hope they werent fattening .. cos i bought and finished them :P anywayz . we missed the bus to boxhill where we were supposedly to have hotpot .. no choice but to cab there ..
pau selah hippie shayna tammi and joyce had already started eating .. we joined in .. somehow or another .. i wasnt tat full after all the eating .. omg~!! am i turning into a pig ???? NOOOO!!!! hehe :P anywayz .. ya .. we went to have gelati .. or should i say i went and ate gelati after tat .. well .. it was really yummy .. but surprsisingly ..it wasnt as fun as last time .. nor it was as filling ... hmm .. oh well .. but was glad tat i'm finally not gated!! i'm free!!

saturday- SANDY"S 18th BIRTHDAY
went to joyce's hse to celebrate her bday :) was great fun .. went to her hse in the morning and had to carry the groceries that she bought for joyce :P haha .. yupz ... she made me carry all those stuff .. but it was alrite ..the tot of us eating them up and bbq 'em all .. simply shuts me up :P ya.. nard and earth bought alcohol :P yumm ,... awesome .. anywayz .. i cooked some yummy chicken and mushroom .. so proud .. then when we just started to get into it .. it rained!@1! arrrhhh .. oh well .. moved into joyce's hse .. well .. we started playin games..
- marsmellow chuck and catch
- gruesome fishball with various sauces
- the most of all .. i tot them how to play mafia with limited amt of ppl (nard,joyce,sandy,lorraine,maggie) i miss playing mafia with u guys so much~!!!!!!!!
- drank .. for some unknown reason .. my face got really red .. but i have to clarify tat i wasnt drunk ok?? i was still in a clear mind :)
- slept over at joyce's hse .. watched a movie by the hot and charming louis koo :P

AFTER CAMP BEING CANCELLED
it was still good :)

well .. sadly camp was cancelled .. i guessed all the yr 11 were depressed cos .. supposedly we would have been having fun out there .. maybe skiiing .. at least no school .. but yet the stupid power failure and trees on the campsite stopped it and we all had to go to school .. how shit was it? no one was in a schooling mood .. ppl even wag school ... but course not me .. i oni missed badminton training ACCIDENTALLY!

the school made a leadership program on fri to make up the camp .. it was held at school.. we had speakers and some activities.. yupz .. it was good .. NO SCHOOL :) ya .. in the morning ...after roll call .. we went to the school hall and did some activities

1. photo of when u started school or kinder ..
well .. i've oni got a photo of me when i was 4 .. i brought it there. .i had so much baby fat then .. yet now .. it went down to my body~!! >.< anywayz ya .. we had to share memories of us when we were young with the person next to us ... mandy told me how she was called bread face when she was young ..and it really kinda suited her .. no offense though .. :P anywayz .. then we were divided into groups to write out the comparison between when we were young and now ..
group F consisted of
-mandy
-lydia
-serene
-tamista
-cat
-laura
-ashley
-hannah
-yaya
-me

2. speaker
it was supposedly to be the carreers counsellor .. guess she must be real busy .. she dint come and the talk was presented by mrs casey. she talked about making decision and choices .. especially in our tertiary studies .. was kinda boring .. :P but i like her closing speech .. "leadership is about involvement and commitment. have both"

3. ice breaker
we had the dance which is somesort tat resembles night walk in camp fire .. for me .. it's kinda different .. was totally messed up >.< but still had fun :)

4. speaker
the ex- legal study teacher came to talk to us about leadership (mind u .. this was supposedly to be a leadeship camp) ... she was a really good speaker .. even when there were technical difficulties .. she told us that leadership is about communications .. it's about leading your own life before leading others .. lots and lots .. such a pity i cant remember all of them .. i would love to share it though!! oh ya .. she said one's life is like cross-stich and tapestry .. on the front or the surface is great and nice and beautiful ..yet when u turn it over .. there's mistake .. thread not cutten ... knots all over and stuff .. u would oni show the back to the family and family . .. arrrghhhh.. i cant recap wat else did she say but i remember that she was a fab speaker and she has this quote tat stuck on my head..
"management is about doin the right things and leadership is about doing things rite "

5. lunch
pizza for free .. yummm ...everyone was supposedly to oni have 2 pieces .. but boarders ... (me) had more than tat. . i had 3! ya .. :P anywayz .. we went to play basketbal after tat .. was great fun though .. but too bad i had to go back earlier to finish decorating our shoe box to give it to the poor kids

6. speaker
she told us about parties .. drinking.. clubbing and also the consequences of them ..
for more info .. log on to www.wholenewworld.com.au
great stuff :)

7. spring festival carnival
each group had to come up with 2 models .. modelling the group's most creative fashion for the spring fashion . shall upload some photos later .. was great fun though .. serene and cat were the models .. mandy played music to go with the show .. i kinda wanna be the model at first but then serene took it ..so i was like ..ok .. yeah ... i dun mind .. :P

camp dint take place .. but was replaced by this one day leadership program .. it was great stuf f .. i guessed god have other arrangements for us when somethings dint happen ... i'm sure tat it's for the better :) yet .. i couldnt help thinking that it would be way better if we had been to the camp .. but on the other hand .. it wasnt tat bad ..

CAMP"S CANCELLED!!!!

oh my god~!! can u believe it.?!! camp's cancelled becoz the thunderstorm last nite strucked the trees and 15 trees had fallen down on the school compound !!! after all the preparation and packing and all the effort tat everyone put in~!! now it's cancelled~!!! >.< everyone's disappointed cos tmr and fri has to be a normal studying day~! when we first tot tat we could escape and have a break .. but now!!! no@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >.< gosh!! now tat camp's over.. all those junk tat i bought for camp are now gonna turn into fats~!! (cos i bot so much ~)

the day gals were really disappointed cos camp to them were supposedly to be a real big thing~! >.< it's like an overnight party for them .. but for boarders.. it's like a relaxing time .. to get out of school ground and slack off~ .. now !!! everyone has to study! HATE it ... annoying~! getting fat .. and not doing anything productive~!! >.<

good luck at ur trials or coming exams if u have one :P

well .. anywayz. . happy merdeka day
i'm still proud to be a malaysian~!! :)

before i go off to camp tomorrow.. i've keep up to my words..
here's a photo of me elisa in white.. mandy in black and tammi in green
look at me and think of me as ur trials are coming nearer k???





take care. shall update after i come back from camp :P

TERM COMING TO AN END ~
yet i'm not going back~ *sob sob*

aikz .. how time flies .. term coming to an end~!!! how fast!!! well ... this would be the first time of me not going home .. i'm kinda scared and anxious. . i duno how am i gonna survive this long lasting 3 weeks?? no school .. no excercise .. dont have the convenience of internet access .. dun have the comfort of being myself for i have to behave myself in front of my cousins and guardians .. >.< aikz aikz .. how??? i kinda wanna go home now tat everyone who was staying back are changing their minds and buying ticket to go home >.< aikz .. but then i will not! .. i am determined and i shall help mum and dad to save money~! .. (since i wasted so much on food! :P ) well .. anywayz .. i'm hunting for a job over the hols to fill up my time .. or else i wont do anything productive other than gain weight (which is the last thing i want!!!!! ) argghhhhh!!!! any suggestions of wat can i do?

oh ya~! have i mentioned that i've successfully completed my 40hour famine 2 weeks ago??? if not .. yupz!! i have *applause* :P hehe :P i survived 40hours without solid food .. had oni been drinking juice .. and surprisingly enough .. i wasnt tat hungry .. hmmm .. maybe i should be doing this more often .. so tat i can loose all the fats in me!! :P hehe :P

so glad tat dad's coming over at the end of the term~!! really excited bout it cos at least i can still feel tat i'm connected to my home and family :) excited excited .. (partially becos he's bringing me more food :) apparently he's gonna bring mooncake!!!! hehe ~!! ) ya.. but it's good though .. cos it's the beginning of the hols and i stay with him .. and do wateva i feel comfortable doing :) yay~!!

well .. quite alot of lil things been happening .. nothing too much tat is really exciting .. but then .. ya..
senior house sports ..
badminton competitions
swimming trials
yr11 camp coming up .. actually ..it is tmr!!!
nominations for the school captains

STuFFED up 2 out of 3 TESTS ..
how bad can it be?

well .. guess i'm completely ok and learning to get over the fact tat life is full of "people running to meet each other .. with their hands open ... but their purpose is wrong .. they meet and continue to run.. passing each other" (i'm quoting from my english text book , Accidental Tourist, from last semester ) hehe :P ya .. i guess .. people do run to meet each other .. well ... i;m fortunate enough tat i havent met anyone who has a fault purpose :P .. but then .. i guess what "purpose" meant in the text is tat the view of life is different .. ok .. shall not discuss about my boring book .. i hate it anywayz .. but i couldnt stop getting pissed at myself for just simply being the dumbest gal in the school~!!!! god~!! why are they so smart??

as most of u might have known .. i've got 3 tests this week ... 2 maths application task (damn complicated maths question phrased in words not maths equations) and one chinese oral sac (school assessment course) . .. well .. i admit tat i wasnt really prepared for maths cos i've got chinese sac .. as it is more important .. but then the fact tat i screwed up chinese sac made me felt so useless and so stupid .. all the effort were all wasted ~!! >.< i hate it !! i hate it !! i hate it!!!

i had spent nights and nights trying real hard to memorise my chinese sac shit .. and i really made the effort cos ii wanna do well in it .. yesterday ..when i was standing outside the door .. i still fell alrite ..as in still had all the shit in my head .. feeling alrite confident but still slightly nervous .. .. then .. as i enter .. my blood was pumping ..and for no reasons .. i start to freak out ..i duno y but i was real nervous!!!! gosh~!!! she is my teacher and i'd seen her so many times .. but i was still nervous~!! why though??? worse thing was tat i went blank .. not knowing how to speak up my words .. i had the image of the info in my head tat i memorised .. but words just dun seemed to come out of my mouth .. grr~!! why though ??? i was trying to focus and kept telling myself tat i can do it .. i can i can .. but it dint really work .. i was stiill nervous .. i stuttered .. i went ermm .. as if i have some speech problem ..and all of those yucky ggross shit had been recorded and will be sent out to assess if needed ... gross!!! how could i just do tat though?? stumbled over my speech .. went blank and wat else could go wrong? >.< the annoyin bit was tat when i was outside the room . i was completely fine~!! nothing like wat i was when i was inside ...

the effort i took to prepare it now .. it simply seems to be tedious! .. i slept at 1 . waking up at 5 for 2 continuous nights to prepare it .. and on the very day itself i had badminton training .. tat i tried to wake up earlier to go through it .. (but i couldnt :P) all the initiatives seemed so much like a wasted effort~!! >< hate myself for being so dumb ..

and just then .. maths application task .. left out one page completely blank! ... i had no time becos the previous questions i was making dumb mistakes!! and the question was worth 13 marks!! gosh . .. another screwed up test again~! arrrgggghhhh!!!
i feel like slapping myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aikz .. have to pull myself together .. it's oni 2 freaking dumb tests! who cares! yet inside myself .. i do care!!!!!!!! >.< so contradictory eh?

i'm fine .. just a bit frustrated at myself .. but i'm fine ..